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21/2/2017 2 Comments

Feel that Crippling Self-Doubt? You're Making Progress

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IT'S ONLY natural to want to stop when things gets tough. Because, let's face it -- putting yourself out there isn't easy. When you put your hard work and honest opinions online, people can judge you based on that work. They can tell you that you're wrong. Or that what you've got to say isn't valuable in any way. Or make you feel small.  

The thing is, we crave attention for our work, but when people start noticing you it can make you feel vulnerable. But being vulnerable isn't always a bad thing. In my personal experience, when you're beginning to feel uncomfortable, when you catch yourself thinking that maybe this wasn't for you after all, that is normally when you're on the verge of something awesome. 

However, there's a difference between having healthy misgivings about something, and being so far out of your comfort zone that you want turn and hide in a deep comfy hole for the next decade. One works on the basis of logic, the other feeds off of your insecurities and weaknesses.  We all have them.

You see, it's difficult to picture those big changes when you haven't actually experienced them. That's what makes hindsight so valuable. You can look back and think, yes, I was on the path to greatness. Silly me. But until then, it's sheer blind faith that keeps you chipping away on that project every day, despite that crippling doubt. 

Alright, that was a little cynical. It's not only blind faith. But faith does play a huge part in getting us through those uncertain times. Faith and hope. 

When setting a target, it's important not to aim too high. However, it's just as important not to aim too low, either. The idea of a target is that you work towards a goal that is slightly out of your reach. By making things too easy for yourself, you're not allowing yourself much space to grow and improve. Set it too high, and you're more likely to become discouraged and give up. You're only human, after all. 

I've come to the conclusion that change is supposed to be uncomfortable. When you throw yourself into the deep end, there are two possible ways in which you will react. You will either: 

  1. Panic, flail and then sink
  2. Panic, flail and then learn to swim

In order to lean how to swim, though, we must put ourselves outside out comfort zone. Give ourselves the chance to learn and adapt. Because the magic of change is that if you stick at it, even through that crippling doubt, that one day we will discover that we have grown to fill that large, scary space.

The change becomes the new comfort zone. 

What do you think? 



2 Comments
Maria Kinnersley
19/3/2017 04:17:48 pm

It's the first time I've read one of your posts and what a great one that was. Probably because I am struggling with a hefty dose of self doubt myself.
You've encouraged me to 'keep chipping away' at the draft novel that I'm struggling to put together. I think the problem with doubting yourself is that it does paralyse you and that you have to be almost brutal in pushing yourself forward. And coming to writing in mature years I think makes it worse. Thanks again for a great post. Have now signed up for your newsletter.

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Rachel Hobbs
19/3/2017 04:35:57 pm

Thank you for your kind comments, Maria. I'm so pleased that you found this post encouraging. Keep going with your novel, you've got this!

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    Rachel Hobbs

    Author of dark fantasy Shadow-Stained. Dental nurse by day and writer by night. 

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